A lighter post from when I lived in Tibetan China: a list of things I did in no particular order.
I cook. You laugh, but I like simple things.
I eat with my Tibetan Buddhist, Hui Muslim, Han Atheist friends (separately of course).
I walk the streets and parks watching families, grandmothers, roast-yam sellers.
I watch grandfathers concentrate on chess, majiang, card games.
I watch the same movies (I recommend Kunfu Panda).
I sleep without an alarm.
I realize I'm from the West.
I realize I'm from the East.
I read philosophy (in English), the news (in Spanish), essays (in Chinese), and sometimes textbooks (in math). The wonders and frustrations of languages.
I connect with family, with friends old and new, or just a friendly face.
I learn to fight.
I learn to let go when fighting is useless.
I teach.
And I do all these things without looking at the clock.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Friday, June 12, 2009
何苦呢
理发师想方设法动员我染发，这样他能收我200而不是20。
“你的头发好黄啊。你应该把它染黑，这样能显得你的皮肤更白。”
可在我住的地方，人们把头发染黄去显得他们的皮肤更黑。
一样难理解的事：我的白肤色朋友花很多精力和钱把他们的皮肤晒黑，那紫外线还可以致癌。
我的深肤色朋友也花很多时间和金钱把他们的皮肤花白，那些化妆品也可能致癌。
这是何苦呢。
“你的头发好黄啊。你应该把它染黑，这样能显得你的皮肤更白。”
可在我住的地方，人们把头发染黄去显得他们的皮肤更黑。
一样难理解的事：我的白肤色朋友花很多精力和钱把他们的皮肤晒黑，那紫外线还可以致癌。
我的深肤色朋友也花很多时间和金钱把他们的皮肤花白，那些化妆品也可能致癌。
这是何苦呢。
Thursday, June 11, 2009
The Tibet Question
Having spent my year in Tibetan China, many have asked my thoughts on the Tibet issue. I usually dodge so precarious a question as whoever asks (Chinese or Western) usually has strong opinions either way, ones that will not hear fresh views in one conversation. Here, I attempt to articulate views that are entirely my own. I hope to convey some of its complexity and always remain open to new perspectives.
The most popular question: Do I think Tibet should be free?
China will never let allow Tibet independence because it will set the precedent for subsequent successions in the minority west that can lead to 40% land loss. China poised as the emerging powerhouse, will not allow itself to be broken up like the Soviet Union was in its decline. China has 56 minorities that it has fought to conquer and to assimilate over 5,000 years. Historical, cultural, religious differences between Tibetans and Hans will continue to be squashed through the pursuit of a harmonious society via homogeneity.
The question should be: How can Tibetans be treated equally, with respect by their Han Chinese government(CG)?
The answer does not lie in “Free Tibet” campaigns. The more the West portrays Tibet as a victim, the more the Chinese government feels the West (US especially) is trying to break up China as a potential super-power rival. This leads to more state oppression and propaganda. Oppression keeps taking away liberties from Tibetans. Propaganda tells Hans how ungrateful these vile Tibetans are where they are rioting and killing Hans when CG has poured in billions of development aid/Han tax dollars to Tibet. Ill-will between Hans and Tibetans multiply, giving CG more ammunition in enacting oppressive policies. CG feels no pressure from Western campaigns (evidenced by its human rights record), especially when it has national support. These campaigns (initiated by exiles in Nepal and India and financed by EU and US) rile those Tibetans already prone to 3/14 acts where Tibetans set Han shops on fire and Han police fire on Tibetans. Post 3/14 led to worse relations between the Dalai Lama and CG, no Tibetans granted passports, greater military presence across 4 Tibetan provinces, Tibetans losing any sympathy they previously had from Hans because they shamed China pre-Olympics. These campaigns do nothing to help Tibetans living in China.
The answer lies in less, not more hostilities between CG and Tibetan government in exile. Yes, the Dalai Lama(DL) cannot be more a peacemaker, but no matter how saintly DL is as a person, the position of DL is not one that CG will accept. The communist party is religiously non-religious. Anything that threatens the Party=god mentality is immediately squashed. Hence the go-to Tibetan representative cannot be a lama and should reside in China. CG also needs a Tibetan sympathizer who will speak genuinely with the Tibetan representative: non-religious, non-independence, non-discriminatory. CG needs to realize how its demonization of DL and immediate denunciation of Tibetan identities only strengthen Tibetan wishes for independence. Both sides need to give in, and this is best achieved through talks between two appointed representatives. The authoritarian Chinese system allows only ‘heroes shape society’, not ‘society shapes heroes’.
I am too aware that the latter solution asks for much ideological and cultural sacrifice from Tibetans. I have seen Tibetans escorted out of malls, harassed by police, looked down upon by shopkeepers. I have witnessed the same massive aid in-flows NOT benefit Tibetans as they do not the Mayans, Quechuas, Africans…then they are blamed for being stupid and lazy. One very educated Han told me: “Scientifically speaking, less oxygen exists above 3,000m, so Tibetans’ brains do not develop to the same capacity as us.”
I cry at the discrimination. But a Civil Rights Movement cannot exist in authoritarian China. Protests end in bloodshed and further oppression as they did in 6/4, 3/14, and many other failed movements.
To really have Tibetan people’s welfare and not one’s own ideology at heart, the T question is not: Should it be free? But, How can Tibetans have a voice in China?
3/14/08 (Lhasa protests) reference: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7941466.stm
6/4/89 (Tiananmen Sq protest) reference: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8057148.stm
The most popular question: Do I think Tibet should be free?
China will never let allow Tibet independence because it will set the precedent for subsequent successions in the minority west that can lead to 40% land loss. China poised as the emerging powerhouse, will not allow itself to be broken up like the Soviet Union was in its decline. China has 56 minorities that it has fought to conquer and to assimilate over 5,000 years. Historical, cultural, religious differences between Tibetans and Hans will continue to be squashed through the pursuit of a harmonious society via homogeneity.
The question should be: How can Tibetans be treated equally, with respect by their Han Chinese government(CG)?
The answer does not lie in “Free Tibet” campaigns. The more the West portrays Tibet as a victim, the more the Chinese government feels the West (US especially) is trying to break up China as a potential super-power rival. This leads to more state oppression and propaganda. Oppression keeps taking away liberties from Tibetans. Propaganda tells Hans how ungrateful these vile Tibetans are where they are rioting and killing Hans when CG has poured in billions of development aid/Han tax dollars to Tibet. Ill-will between Hans and Tibetans multiply, giving CG more ammunition in enacting oppressive policies. CG feels no pressure from Western campaigns (evidenced by its human rights record), especially when it has national support. These campaigns (initiated by exiles in Nepal and India and financed by EU and US) rile those Tibetans already prone to 3/14 acts where Tibetans set Han shops on fire and Han police fire on Tibetans. Post 3/14 led to worse relations between the Dalai Lama and CG, no Tibetans granted passports, greater military presence across 4 Tibetan provinces, Tibetans losing any sympathy they previously had from Hans because they shamed China pre-Olympics. These campaigns do nothing to help Tibetans living in China.
The answer lies in less, not more hostilities between CG and Tibetan government in exile. Yes, the Dalai Lama(DL) cannot be more a peacemaker, but no matter how saintly DL is as a person, the position of DL is not one that CG will accept. The communist party is religiously non-religious. Anything that threatens the Party=god mentality is immediately squashed. Hence the go-to Tibetan representative cannot be a lama and should reside in China. CG also needs a Tibetan sympathizer who will speak genuinely with the Tibetan representative: non-religious, non-independence, non-discriminatory. CG needs to realize how its demonization of DL and immediate denunciation of Tibetan identities only strengthen Tibetan wishes for independence. Both sides need to give in, and this is best achieved through talks between two appointed representatives. The authoritarian Chinese system allows only ‘heroes shape society’, not ‘society shapes heroes’.
I am too aware that the latter solution asks for much ideological and cultural sacrifice from Tibetans. I have seen Tibetans escorted out of malls, harassed by police, looked down upon by shopkeepers. I have witnessed the same massive aid in-flows NOT benefit Tibetans as they do not the Mayans, Quechuas, Africans…then they are blamed for being stupid and lazy. One very educated Han told me: “Scientifically speaking, less oxygen exists above 3,000m, so Tibetans’ brains do not develop to the same capacity as us.”
I cry at the discrimination. But a Civil Rights Movement cannot exist in authoritarian China. Protests end in bloodshed and further oppression as they did in 6/4, 3/14, and many other failed movements.
To really have Tibetan people’s welfare and not one’s own ideology at heart, the T question is not: Should it be free? But, How can Tibetans have a voice in China?
3/14/08 (Lhasa protests) reference: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7941466.stm
6/4/89 (Tiananmen Sq protest) reference: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8057148.stm
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
A time to plant, a time to harvest
Dear Friends,
Some of you have expressed concern that I sound too pessimistic here. Thank you for bringing my attention to it, but I assure you that I'm not on the verge of depression. I simply find blogging to be a good release for thoughts that do not fit well into everyday conversation. Imagine when you are talking about the rising prices of soy sauce (or mozzarella), the other person says: "Touching multiple worlds can be a source of existential angst." Instead I say: "Soy sauce on mozzarella may be good." And I leave the former contemplation for here.
But at times when I am anxious, I give a special shout out to the old and new friends who have remained so faithful through my emotional rollercoasters. You dusted me off time and again as I tripped over the same rocks (that I put there myself). When I grumbled over the same things (ones that I do), you are as patient as hearing it for the first time. Thank Allah/Buddha/Supreme Being(s)/polytheistic gods for you.
Love,
Charlene
Some of you have expressed concern that I sound too pessimistic here. Thank you for bringing my attention to it, but I assure you that I'm not on the verge of depression. I simply find blogging to be a good release for thoughts that do not fit well into everyday conversation. Imagine when you are talking about the rising prices of soy sauce (or mozzarella), the other person says: "Touching multiple worlds can be a source of existential angst." Instead I say: "Soy sauce on mozzarella may be good." And I leave the former contemplation for here.
But at times when I am anxious, I give a special shout out to the old and new friends who have remained so faithful through my emotional rollercoasters. You dusted me off time and again as I tripped over the same rocks (that I put there myself). When I grumbled over the same things (ones that I do), you are as patient as hearing it for the first time. Thank Allah/Buddha/Supreme Being(s)/polytheistic gods for you.
Love,
Charlene
Saturday, June 6, 2009
Tanto Tiempo Busque
Sabes de Reik:
Como aguja en un pajar
Te busqué sin cesar
Como huella en el mar
Tan difícil de hallar
Tanto tiempo busqué
Pero al fin encontré
Tan Perfecta
Como te imagine
Escuchando a Reik, pienso que todavia estoy buscando para "esa cosa", "eso camino", "eso persona". Ojala que como en todos los casos, la busqueda es mas importante que la resulta.
Como aguja en un pajar
Te busqué sin cesar
Como huella en el mar
Tan difícil de hallar
Tanto tiempo busqué
Pero al fin encontré
Tan Perfecta
Como te imagine
Escuchando a Reik, pienso que todavia estoy buscando para "esa cosa", "eso camino", "eso persona". Ojala que como en todos los casos, la busqueda es mas importante que la resulta.
Friday, June 5, 2009
有一天啊，璐璐。。。
前几天是表妹的生日。她是我唯一认识的人有着24岁的身体、44岁的智慧、4岁心灵。
你头脑里是什么样的世界呢？在我们这些同岁身体、智慧、心灵的凡人的世上有很多人，但好多人还是很寂寞，被寂寞折磨的疲倦。你呢？在你那边的人不多吧？你在那边还满恰然自得的嘛。
记得二选一嘛？我想要是三选一的话：长的好看、头脑很好、心里平静，人都会选心平的。不但能够包含自己，也能容世上难容之事。你怎么那么幸运，还没去要已得到了心平呢？还是恰恰因为你不去争它，它就来了呢？
你24岁的生日璐璐，我祝你一生能像你现在一样：被文字而感动、被歌词而惊喜、被故事而入迷。我祝你能继续站在大白兔的毛上而不是缩在里面，用你4岁的眼睛去同时看着我们和苏菲的世界。
我们已知道生活是矛盾的、循环的。所以我祝你离座时记住你灿烂过、痛苦时记得那是幸福的另一面、知道可被心碎时去爱、去了解他人但生活在你的美妙世界里。
生日快乐啊，璐璐。
你头脑里是什么样的世界呢？在我们这些同岁身体、智慧、心灵的凡人的世上有很多人，但好多人还是很寂寞，被寂寞折磨的疲倦。你呢？在你那边的人不多吧？你在那边还满恰然自得的嘛。
记得二选一嘛？我想要是三选一的话：长的好看、头脑很好、心里平静，人都会选心平的。不但能够包含自己，也能容世上难容之事。你怎么那么幸运，还没去要已得到了心平呢？还是恰恰因为你不去争它，它就来了呢？
你24岁的生日璐璐，我祝你一生能像你现在一样：被文字而感动、被歌词而惊喜、被故事而入迷。我祝你能继续站在大白兔的毛上而不是缩在里面，用你4岁的眼睛去同时看着我们和苏菲的世界。
我们已知道生活是矛盾的、循环的。所以我祝你离座时记住你灿烂过、痛苦时记得那是幸福的另一面、知道可被心碎时去爱、去了解他人但生活在你的美妙世界里。
生日快乐啊，璐璐。
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Choose One
A popular Taiwanese TV host was asked in an interview:
"If you can only choose one, would you want to have a beautiful face or a brilliant mind?"
"A beautiful face of course."
"Intelligence is not important?"
"If you don't have a pretty face, you'd probably realize it pretty quickly, but if you don't have sufficient brains, maybe you'd never realize it."
Such wisdom...
I choose the same as him but was given the opposite instead. So I have just enough brains to realize that I have neither a pretty face nor a nearly brilliant enough mind as well as a host of other unpleasant things that has everything or nothing to do with me.
grumblz grumblz
"If you can only choose one, would you want to have a beautiful face or a brilliant mind?"
"A beautiful face of course."
"Intelligence is not important?"
"If you don't have a pretty face, you'd probably realize it pretty quickly, but if you don't have sufficient brains, maybe you'd never realize it."
Such wisdom...
I choose the same as him but was given the opposite instead. So I have just enough brains to realize that I have neither a pretty face nor a nearly brilliant enough mind as well as a host of other unpleasant things that has everything or nothing to do with me.
grumblz grumblz
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)