Chinese New Year

My last posts have portrayed Beijing as sexist and racist, but Laura pointed out that those qualities are in the States as well. I certainly agree that prejudices exist everywhere, and the difference is to what degree they are blatant and widely accepted in a society. Below is a conversation with my family that I'm sure is echoed in all families to some extent.

Background information:

Chinese females my age or older are raised as asexual beings throughout their school years. Hormones, puberty do not exist in the realm of conversation. But as soon as she finishes college, she is expected be on the active lookout for potential husbands. She is to have a drive so strong that she feels a need to be married in a couple years. Everything done on schedule.

Charlene: Happy New Year Grandma!

Grandma: Happy New Year! You are here so late.

Charlene: Grandpa told me to come at 6.

Grandma: Oh, don't you listen to him. Do you have a boyfriend yet?

Younger Aunt: Oh Mom, you think Charlene is going to tell you whether she has a boyfriend or not?

Older Aunt: We just want to prepare ourselves if she is going to bring home an American.

Grandma: I can't believe we are going to have Americans in the family.

Younger Aunt: Mom, Charlene is already an American. She doesn't even have a Chinese identity card anymore.

Grandma: She is still Chinese. She doesn't look American. Now Charlene, you need to be serious about your boyfriend situation. (there do not exist non-serious boyfriends) You are not young anymore and need to be thinking of your future. Your cousins can introduce you to people from their work. (My cousins are investment bankers in Beijing, so their coworkers would fit the criteria of good job, house, family in Beijing).

Younger Aunt: Oh Mom, leave her alone. Charlene can find her own boyfriends.

She calls this over her shoulder as she pulls me aside: "You know how your grandma is old-fashioned. You can tell me all about this boy: American or Chinese."

"African, auntie."

Eyes pop, jaw drops, "He is African American? Where did you meet?"

"We met in Africa. He is just African."

"Is he ... (swallows noticeably) black?"

"As ink."

"I've seen really black people. It's a bit scary because you wouldn't be able to see them in the dark if they don't smile!"

"Hmmm, I suppose if they weren't wearing any clothes...they would indeed be The Invisible Man."